Reviews by BAMF

Okay I saw a trailer for this awhile back and was interested with what I saw. Now I watch the trailer again and wow does it look cheesy. I think the goofiness and gore effects are what possibly drew me in. Most of the "actresses" here are just models. It doesn't help that one of the recognizable faces here was the actor from the Fifty Shades of Grey parody Bound. Anyways I enter this at my own risk. Hell even if it's bad it might be the fun kind of bad.

It's a strange idea to start a movie like this in the middle of the chaos. I do think I understand that their idea might be to get people interested in the prequel to see what happened. Although I wonder if that is just a strategy and the prequel has nothing to do with our current characters.

So the acting is not really all that good and you can tell this was pretty low budget. I do think the injured guy had a lot of the good one-liners. He was also probably the best actor of the group to be honest. The birthday girl in the bar has an accent that I absolutely love. I think there are some characters I actually liked here such as Troit (who comes to save the day), Chandi(the Hindu hottie with Troit), and Billy (the injured guy). Everyone else is boring or over the top.

There are so many stupid scenes and ideas throughout this. I'm sure some were meant to add humor, but they only caused me to shake my head in disgust. It sounds like they say Wes Craven throughout the entire movie which I feel was intended. It however wasn't really amusing to me. The killers (whom I have no idea what they are besides maybe some kind of weird tribe or whatever) constantly tear clothes off the women and watch as others get naked. I don't get why they have to be perverted as well as murderous. Also there is a dumb little filler scene where the guy who went for help stumbles across a woman changing and watches her wasting time. What was the point of showing all the girls at the bar and doing nothing with them. The girls are pretty attractive for the most part with many showing off their bodies either in skimpy outfits or with nothing on. Sadly it doesn't really do anything for the movie other than make it feel like some nude photoshoot with horror thrown into the mix and some nonsensical plot.

What kind of person came up with these character names like Grawesome Crutal which doesn't sound like it would be a name in any language? Troit doesn't sound like a name either, but it is an actual word meaning narrow. Most of the other names are pretty normal though oddly enough.

The death scenes were pretty plain and boring. In fact in some cases you barely even see the death scenes. It's sad that they couldn't even do anything really original with them either. There was an off-screen death scene that made absolutely no sense as you can't even see it.

So this is a part of a trilogy. The way it's edited really does not work too well. It starts in the middle without us knowing what the hell is going on. We don't really know anything about the main group other than they are running from something. Also only two characters supposedly died which I'm sure will happen in the prequel. If the prequel has shows only those two then it's probably going to be pretty boring or just full of random nudity. It may even have some flashback scenes to other groups or just random deaths of strangers just to add kills. It might even just be more boring and pointless than this one.

The way this ended was really lame. First of all there is no reaction to something that happens which seems mostly like bad script writing. It also just ends on a really awfully edited cliffhanger. It kind of does make me want to see what they were looking at and what happens though. I guess in that regard it somewhat did it's job at making one wonder. The way this trilogy breaks off seems more like we are getting the before and after of some commercial breaks which I'm not too sure was a good idea.

Pros:
-A few likeable characters
-Some little bits of funny lines
-Somewhat attractive women with nice bodies

Cons:
-It tries to keep our attention with said ladies with nice bodies
-The acting is pretty awful
-The death scenes are tame and unoriginal
-The editing is awful
-It feels like a very long TV episode that came back from commercial and ended before the next one
-Kane Hodder is barely in it and seemingly killed off after only like 5 minutes of screen time

Anyways the point is the movie was pretty bad and not worth the time wasted on it. This one I actually wanted to turn off, but I didn't so that I could see if anything changed. My opinion might be different for the prequel and the sequel which yes I will be watching. As I am a glutton for punishment. I do think the third may be more enjoyable as Chandi and Troit survived and I actually like those two. Anyways if you decide to watch this you have been warned. It doesn't have much of anything going for it except a very few exceptions.

I heard about this after seeing that it would be coming to my theater. This was automatically a must see because my theater hasn't played a horror movie in several years. I watched the trailer and was even more excited. I really enjoyed David Robert Mitchell's other film The Myth of the American Sleepover as well.

The premise is really interesting and quite original. This is a movie that actually really creeped me out. That never really happens to be honest which is great! The music seems like they didn't try too hard which is fine because it worked perfectly here. I'm glad that this wasn't a cluster of stupid death scenes. It actually builds a lot of tension and lets us get to know our main characters pretty well. I thought the actors/characters were all great and interesting.

Only one scene in the beginning is pretty brutal other than that it's mostly just an atmospherically creepy movie. It has a very arthouse style feel to it as there are several shots throughout of the scenery. There are even some points where it slowly zooms in on something. This even had a few moments that were kind of funny in an otherwise creepy movie. I thought the ending was well done although I'm sure some audience members might complain. I personally would find it not too difficult to come out with a sequel or two. The following titles being covered as It Follows Too and It Still Follows. I joke.

Pros:
-An original idea for a horror film
-A monster that isn't ridiculously over the top
-Atmospherically different than many horror
-Likeable actors/characters
-It was actually creepy and made me nervous
-There is room for more to the story

Cons:
-I guess the only one is that there is never an explanation to why, how, or what the creature is although in all honesty it doesn't even truly matter.

I really enjoyed this movie. It kept me glued to my seat from start to finish. I recommend if you think the horror genre is lacking originality that this should be on your "to watch" list.

I enjoyed the first one as it was something unique and different. That being said I knew I would be watching this as soon as I could. Knowing that the director had directed some episodes of Misfits (a show I loved) gets me even more excited. That was definitely a messed up little dogfight there. Don't be confused by this. It is a sequel to the original Monsters from a couple years back. It isn't the usual kind of sequel. From the trailer I had expected it to be a war solely on the monsters. This is a war movie that takes place within the world of Monsters which I have to say albeit not what I expected it's quite enticing.

This has a lot more adult material in it than the previous film which I wasn't quite expecting. I was disappointed at the fact that I knew some of the deaths would happen and somewhat in which way. Even though it was slightly predictable it still sucked when it happened. I really enjoyed all the characters here and thought the actors portrayed them quite well. I've seen people say the monsters here are just backdrops, but I see much more here than the last film. I believe they even added some additional creatures as well.

It seems to me that the people who thought this one was bad didn't really understand the point of it all. As I stated before the monsters are part of the world. The previous film had basically the same idea of having the monsters as the background to the humans. The actual story of that is entirely different to this one, but generates the same idea that the monsters aren't the danger of these films. It's kind of like zombies. How many zombie films have it where there are no other evils than the undead? We are the monsters in a way. Anyways the monsters here do have some interactions with the story. Yeah they aren't constant or always heavy interactions, but I felt it as enough. One thing I do agree with others is that this is quite unnecessarily long. For two hours I would have liked them to have done things a little differently like letting some of the characters last a bit longer than they did. I think the ending left a little to be desired.

Pros:
-An original idea for a sequel
-Follows the fact the monsters aren't actually the main focus
-The acting is pretty good
-Most of the characters are likeable
-More Monsters in this one

Cons:
-A little too long
-Some characters got killed off too early
-Some parts of the plot just got left behind somewhere
-The ending could have been better

Anyways I really enjoyed this movie. I recommend checking it out. Just make sure you aren't expecting the monsters to be the main focus. They aren't supposed to be. Happy watching everybody.

I've been on the look out for this one. I love a good horror movie and I'm actually quite fond of found footage despite popular opinion. This is directed by the writer of a few movies I really enjoyed including High Tension, The Hills Have Eyes remake, and Mirrors who were all directed by the same guy (Alexandre Aja). The cast also has a handful of quite familiar faces which is good, but it does take away the affect of found footage a bit. It's interesting to see that there are a few instances where the filming is normal even though this is categorized as found footage. There were some pretty good death scenes as well as ones I didn't see coming the way they did. The CGI was a bit amateur in some spots, but some of it was actually quite good. It's as if they felt more inclined to work more on some areas than others. The ending was great and not even how I expected it to go.

Pros:
-An interesting look at the horror of something actually scary
-It isn't completely found footage, but it is for the most part
-The acting is quite good
-The mythology was a nice route change as opposed to always seeing Mummies in Egypt
-There were some good brutal and somewhat unexpected deaths

Cons:
-The CGI was a little back and forth

Anyways this was really entertaining and one reason I never listen to what others think on movies. I mean everyone thinks about things differently especially in the world of cinema. If you are looking for something that strives to be different I think this is a good one to checkout.

So I was in the mood to watch a zombie movie with my friend. So we popped up Netflix and this is what caught my attention. I have noticed it before, but never really made the time to sit down and watch it. I was quite impressed with this little gem. It wasn't exactly what I was expecting. That being said it still was quite an intriguing and fresh idea. The main women were attractive. All the characters were quite well rounded. I loved the main couple. There was something I felt should have been more explored with the Returned killers, but otherwise I was quite taken by this film. There isn't too much in way of zombie action, although I didn't find it too necessary for the style this movie was going for.

Pros:
-A fresh idea to an old mythology
-Zombies are my favorite
-Interesting characters and some decent acting
-The ending was fantastic

Cons:
-Too short
-Some plot devices could have been expanded

The ending left room for a sequel. One that I'm sure would be quite different to this, but it would still be quite entertaining. It also kind of reminded me of the movie The Mist because of the ending. I would definitely watch this again.

Wow that is definitely an unexpected way to start a film. If you know nothing about the film or Lars Von Trier it would definitely catch you off guard. I like that she comments how ridiculous the mathematics is. I can see why they use the black screen to emphasize sounds, but I think it would be better fitted in a book not a movie. I feel as if Jamie Bell is a much different, more intense kind of Christian Grey (Fifty Shades of Grey). I say that not having actually seen that movie, but knowing that the character K has no romanticizing qualities. This entry is way more brutal, intense, and disturbed than the first part. I'm glad that it was Shia LaBeouf who played the eldest version of Jerome. The characters started off quite likeable, but then they all become so despicable. I think honestly the only good people in these films are Joe's Father and Younger Jerome. There are some scenes that are quite uncomfortable and disturbing to watch. It isn't easy to suggest films like this to others unless they are aware of the content and it interests them.

Pros:
-It's basically porn, but has an actual plot
-The acting is quite good
-The philosophical aspect is quite interesting

Cons:
-At times it gets a little too brutal for me
-The ending
-Seligman who was almost another one of the only 2 respectable characters attempts to rape Joe in her sleep(his reasoning is even worse)

I actually hated how it ended. This was just insane. It was interesting and a decent watch. It isn't however something I would watch again or at least not in its entirety. Visually this movie is actually quite nice to look at given the content. If it had ended differently I would have enjoyed this more, but as it stands I didn't really enjoy this volume.

Yes I am watching this two part craziness. I decided to go with the director's cuts. So I will be taking my time to watch these as it totals out to about 5 hours or more. I mean it has to be better than that pile of crap Fifty Shades of Grey. So it starts off with a couple minutes of annoying black screen. Then it shows several shots of parts of an alley. It was a bit uncomfortable to see Joe as a toddler and young girl discovering herself. Shia LaBeouf has definitely come a long way from the goofy teen of Even Stevens. Yes this is pretty hardcore with its gratuitous sex scenes, but it is actually quite philosophical. A lot of it I'm sure would go over the average watcher's head as they might only be aware of the sexual more apparent sides of the story. I'm not really one with math so whenever they pop some math on the screen I feel lost. The acting here is actually quite good and the characters themselves are interesting enough.

Pros:
-The acting was great
-The women are attractive
-Lots of naughty bits lol
-Philosophical not just sexual
-Good soundtrack
-Some of it kind of seemed a little silly to me like the Chocolate Sweeties scene

Cons:
-A little too much math here
-Not something you can really watch with others unless you are a nymphomaniac of course
-Can't really recommend it to others for the most part

Anyways this was pretty good. Although if someone walks in on you watching during one of the sex scenes they might think you are watching some slightly more romantic porn. Well on to see what's in store for me in part deux.

I'm not really a big sports fan, but I do enjoy a good sports movie. Ivan Reitman directed this which is pretty interesting since a lot of his movies are comedies and only a few of them were pretty good such as the Ghostbuster films. Anyways the cast here looks quite good. It's nice to see Tom Welling still acting although he isn't a big focus in this or in 2013's Parkland. He is a pretty decent actor and proves he still has some pretty good skills. Football has to be my least favorite sport I've seen. I never really admired it. Now this movie brings drama to probably the least interesting aspect of the game. It's odd to see a sport movie that isn't really about the sport, but rather it's about the people behind the sport.

Pros:
-A different look at something I find least interesting
-Great actors
-Some pretty good drama
-Intelligently written for a sports drama

Cons:
-Ugh football
-A little cliche

All in all it was a decent one time watch. It isn't something I would watch again though. If you like football though this might be your kind of movie.

So basically this is Premium Rush mixed with Run/Brick Mansions. I decided to check this out anyways because action with parkour is simply fun to watch even if it has been done before. I'm hoping there will be some new ideas. Oh that isn't a good sign. This movie took 4 writers! It is directed by the guy who did Paintball (a 2009 horror film I enjoyed). The acting could be better, but it looks to me like Taylor Lautner is just going to end up another direct to DVD action star. I do enjoy the action/parkour scenes which is the sole purpose of this film if we are being honest. I also liked the soundtrack throughout its duration. It definitely has some pretty good moments.

Pros:
-Fast paced action
-Some decent twists and turns
-A great soundtrack
-The director

Cons:
-The acting could use improvement
-It was a little cliched
-The writing could have been better considering it had 4 writers

It is a bit cheesy and there are times where the acting was mediocre, but it is a fun, solid, action film. I say it's a good time killer if you like parkour and action.

This one looked fairly interesting and I enjoyed the eeriness of it's predecessor so I decided to go ahead and watch this one. Oh Tom Harper directed some episodes of Misfits (one of my favorite shows). Now I'm even more intrigued. So with the first one the trailer was kind of boring, but the film was fantastic. This one however had the trailer interesting while the film is so boring and cliched. You got the creepy children as usual. It's full of mostly jump scares rather than much of anything genuinely creepy. It felt like The Orphanage, Mama, and Jessabelle all wrapped together along with several others. I did like the twist about Harry and thought it was quite unique. I really didn't like the ending and thought it was simply a way to give us another death. I mean we only get 3 deaths. One was kind of creative though I suppose.

Pros:
-Jeremy Irvine
-The Airfield scene

Cons:
-Plot Holes and Useless Plot Devices
-Boring
-Very Cliche
-Barely even saw The Woman in Black
-Forgettable ending

This was just plain dumb and that's sad since the first one was pretty good. I say skip this one. It isn't worth it trust me.